Confession: I like Kathy Griffin. Gays too.

I am so glad to sleep in my own bed tonight. I got to see my entire family this weekend. It was nice, we went to Ft Lauderdale beach, and did lots of family stuff together. If you have ever gone 6 months without seeing your family you know how strong you have to be when you do see them because it's for such a short amount of time. I really think being this far away from my family in college has been one of the hardest things about these three years. It just makes me a stronger person. I don't think I took one picture from this weekend though! I was too busy.

I did meet with my  EX-orthodontist Dr. Podray. That meeting did not go over well. Basically I had some questions about the end result of my teeth (even though I had my braces off like 5 or 6 years ago) and he was SO cocky and arrogant and rude and bastardly as he could possibly be. I was a nice ice queen right back to him so there. In fact, Podray, here's a nice little rhyme for you, inspired by Glenns myspace song to me.
L is for the way you look at me... like you are God's gift to orthodontists in the world
O is for the only orthodonist jerk that I want to punch in your pretty little teeth
V is very very extraarrogantly
and E is even more than anyone that I've ever seen

wow that was pretty bad.

WHATEV. Opening four days this week, thank you work. If you make me come to the staff meeting on Friday I'll hold a member hostage, I swear.

Summer B has begun. And if you think you're missing out on a class entitled "Issues in Culture and Society" based solely on the US foreign policies on the War on Terror, believe me, you're not. Thank the Lord for Laura.

I think I am thinking about my 21st birthday... which happens to fall on a Sunday my senior year of college. A la 16 of el Septiembre. Thank you, self, for being so smart (not) in preschool that they bumped you up to kindergarten when you were 4 because NOW you have three years of notbeing21incollegewhenallyourfriendsare to make up for! And I mean, seriously, whats there to do in Fort Myers... I think I've already done everything here illegally already. DARN! So I want to go out on a boat during the day of my birthday. I have no idea if that's even possible but that's what I would like to do!

And it'd be really fun to go OUT of town the following weekend, but with the average trend of my friends and their busy schedules, I'd statistically guess that's not happening! ((And Joy will be happening to be going to a bridal shower in Ft Lauderdale.))  I  don't even care,  I mean geez, if someone wants to get me a stretch limo and/or party bus I won't fight ya. But I truly do not want a cake!

My parents are coming to Fl this weekend! Hooray!

**Oh, PS, if anyone's wondering, I did get to party this weekend like I wanted to. I laid on someones driveway with Joy, too.

***Oh, and PPS... why all the breakups lately? STOP IT!

Holy crap. Nauseating couples are so nauseating! Gag gag gag gag gag gag gag. There is appropriate PDA. There is appropriate internet 'affection'. Why do they need to be so insecure that they have to choke and suffocate everyone around them with their coupleness? People, get a grip!

I am officially burnt out. And I still have one more exam tomorrow, and my grade is kind of depending on it. It's so hard to finish even the study guide for it. I'm so tired my contacts keep getting dry and I can only focus for a couple of minutes at a time- where was I? I gave a huge presentation today and I do another smaller one tomorrow right after my test .Then work. At this point I could get a C and almost not care. (notice::: almost) And I would like to work out but I need all my strength!

I want to go out and see my friends every night starting tomorrow, and Friday and Saturday and Sunday. Yeah thanks. I miss all my girls so so much, some of them I have barely even seen these past six weeks. I wish I could go to Jill's wedding...

Have a good one, I have ONE MORE DAY OF SUMMER A!

Why am I a communication major writing a paper on genetic mutation/research/human cloning?

Some things on my mind.

Why is it that occasionally you envy someone else's life so much that it makes yours feel sort of... inadequate? I've never felt this way until recently... and I think its because someone that I don't really like that much seems to have everything I've ever wanted. And that sparks some nasty feelings of the green eyed monster, I think. Actually, I'm not even sure I'd call it jealousy. I feel sort of... wistful. And it feels yucky.

I hate when anything feels like a competition. I hate when girls do it, I hate when friends do it, enemies, siblings, countries do it. I just don't believe life was made to be competitive. And I hate to feel that way. It feels horrible! I swear its ingrained in our heads at a young age to want to be better than the next. And maybe a tiny bit of competition is healthy at times... with grades...with sports...with job interviews...but life? Maybe it's in our human nature. I mean, Lucifer wanted to be the favorite, the best. And what about Cain?

Blah. Competition makes me think of engagements. Getting engaged or married is not a freakin race. Of course everyone wants to be happy and in love in a forever commitment. But rushing or doing it just to 'win' can make your forever into a no longer. I'm feeling like many girls around my age want to get engaged just to have a big diamond and to "own" their man. Some girls do it for security, for finances, some do it for all the right reasons. I think it just makes me nervous to see so many people making that commitment, many of them that I've seen with histories of crazy relationships and instability.

And brides too. Whaddafrickisup with wedding obligations? Why is it you have to invite family members you don't even like? Why do you 'have' to spend money on things you don't even want? Have people in your wedding party that you barely know like your brothers-wifes-cousins-son? I just want to clear it up right now and say that whenever I do get married, as much as possible about that day is going to be about me, and except for those dumb family members I'm going to make some decisions. I'm not saying I won't take other's feelings into consideration, because that I certainly will, but come on! Weddings are for people who want to share that special day committing to their partner and to the Lord with people that they love and that support them in every way. And I dont think anyone else belongs there. Who cares if that's only five or ten people?

I like pickles but not the sweet kind

There's so much to do sometimes I just want to sit in my room in the dark and do nothing.

Ever get to a place with a aquaintance/friend where you just have to stop caring? I've gotten there recently. And I don't feel bad for feeling this way either. It doesn't feel good either... it's just there.

Working 30 hours and a full summer load is NOT all its cracked up to be.

Definitely considering dropping my summer B class just to have a freakin break.

Glenn and I went to Riverside Church on Sun and saw Lucas and Patrick! HOoray for Moes and big fat burritos. Patrick claims he is coming to cardio class tomorrow... we will see.

I <3 cardio. Lately all I do is work, homework and work out. Interesting how ALL THREE of those have the word "work" in them.

Passport hopefully = vacation.

Summertime the weather's easy.

Glenn and I went to SUNSPLASH WATERPARK today! We got to be little kids again, it was great. We rode all the water slides and I got a bit of a sunburn from laying in a tube in the lazy river. Sunsplash ain't got nothing on the Rapids in West Palm Beach, but it was cheaper and good for a summer day. Finally! I got to do something that didn't involve school, waking up early or working.

I got two new bathing suits.

Desperate Housewives season 3 is OVER!

Danny moves to NY next week and his goodbye party is Wed night late... I work til 7pm that night and have school at 8am... is there any possible way I can drive to WP, (2 hr drive... be there around 9:30-10) go to a party that ends at 2 (drive back, be back 4-4:30am) and be back in time for class from 8-12? Hmmm...things like this are possible when you put your mind to it.

Miracles won on Thursday!

I wish someone would bequeath me a house (4 bed, 4 bath please) in Ft Myers for a year.

My dad is ok! The surgery went really well and he's feeling ok. Not in too much pain either, just a little soreness and dry throat from the tube down it. As soon as the herniated disk was fixed, the other disk and pinched nerve just fell into place... or something like that...so that was really a blessing.

My present is sucking... living situation especially. One of my roomies is so hard to live with, for everyone, not just me. She just has made the choice to be difficult, and to be rude, and to be uncaring. Living with other people is hard enough, why make it worse? Summer school- is summer school. It's hard to reason with yourself that this is your last summer as a student in the "college world"- and here you are taking classes and kicking your own butt. Everything now is for payoff later, and thats what I just have to keep telling myself. A year from now, I won't live with her. (actually way less than a year.) A year from now I will graduate, and the classes and homework I gripe about now will payoff eventually. A year from now I will be making plans to move somewhere else, and hopefully things will be coming together more clearly. The soreness in my WHOLE BODY from cardio class will payoff in the future.

FUTURE FUTURE FUTURE. Keep it in mind, because the Lord does have a plan.